Preparedness is not about what you think you can do but rather what you’ve been taught to do.
C.G. Thomas
That bundle of joy, bright eyed and sweet smelling kid has become your joy stealing, snacking, gamer with FOMO…
What is FOMO you say? FEAR OF MOVING OUT! They won’t go anywhere! You’ve made suggestions, set up job interviews, and offered to assist with paying rent all to no avail. You have been waiting for your home, car, and honestly your pockets to become kid free.
Free of begging little snatchers sucking your bank account dry. Now come on, yes it sounds harsh but you know it’s true and exactly what you were thinking but afraid to say.
How do you encourage your grown children living at home to exit stage left? When is it ok to express your desire to empty the nest? This can be difficult because after all this is your kid and your guilty conscience won’t allow you to just put them out. So you set your dreams aside and continue to provide for and parent an adult instead of holding them accountable for their care.
I hate to see you go!
The love we have for our children can at times skew our ability to hold them accountable. It is totally acceptable to set a limit on the time they can live under your roof as an adult. Now, I’m not saying throw the baby out with the bath water, I’m just saying have an honest conversation about your expectations as it relates to the current living arrangements.
Game plan, and execution
Now that you have gotten over your guilty conscience and grown a backbone you can assist your young adult with a game plan for moving out. Listen, set realistic and attainable goals as it relates to what is affordable and the time frame it will take to achieve stability before moving out. Hold their feet to the fire but let them know it is a joint effort in helping them establish independence.
When all else fails…
What do you do when you’ve offered assistance with saving, created a game plan for moving out and your mini-me still refuses to grow up? TOUGH LOVE! Humans are the only creature that coddle our offspring to a fault. Eagles push their babies out of the nest with the expectation that they will fly or fall. Sometimes you need to have the spirit of an eagle and let them fly or hit the ground.
All jokes aside, you have done your job and raised a person who should be responsible for themselves. There is no shame in wanting to live the life you sat aside to raise a respectable family. Help, yes… enable, no. We get one life and you’ve dedicated more than a third of it to everyone else. Don’t be afraid to empty the nest, be more afraid to finance the lifestyle of a young adult who will mooch off of you for your remaining life.
Live please!
I hope you’ve enjoyed your view inside the mind of Sugar Clark!
Be Blessed!
