That little human is watching you…
C.G. Thomas
“I have no clue of who you could be talking to! I am not one of your little friends!” I screamed to the high heavens while the boys watched me with fear and anger alike written on their faces. Ha, what’s comical about the situation is, I had done the very thing I was grilling them about the night before.
Wait, did it matter? After all, I was the parent and they were subject to my rules. Guess what… it really mattered.
Children are little sponges mimicking everything and I mean everything we do. They walk like us, talk like us, and pick up our habits be them good or bad. Why would they not do what we do?
As parents we believe we have supreme authority to rule every action and or thought our children have. God forbid you have a rebellious one because they get beaten into submission. I’m not saying the aforementioned actions are done with malice because I don’t believe that is the case. However, I do think most people parent based on learned behaviors. Therein lies the problem.
Think about it, denial of a thing only makes you desire it more. So telling children no when they are watching you consume all things bad is like vinegar on the tongue, just bitter. Let’s change the narrative… Here are a few things I’ve come to realize as my sons grew:
Did you forget?
Did you forget you were once a child? No, but you did forget how it felt to hear the famous “I’m the parent and you are the child” speech. Something can be said about a familiar experience, it will either change your mind or make you hunker down. If it is for the betterment of our children, hopefully it will change your mind.
Lead by example
I’m a boy mom! Three beautiful strong men; men that were very well adjusted at a young age. Young men that required me to be a better person. I made a vow that I would be the example of a good human because I refused to let them be anything but. Quit taxing these babies with being what you refuse to be…
Accountability has never hurt anybody…
Listen, if you mess up, fess up. You can’t rip the head off of someone that is following in your footsteps! Lastly, if you are wrong admit you are wrong. The lesson does not always have to be based on the wrong of a child, it carries a much greater value when they see you are also able to make mistakes and fix it.
Look, I am not the kid genie and I will never profess to know it all but I will tell you that the relationship I have with my sons has greatly improved with a mindset change. Geesh… just give a little grace.
I hope you have enjoyed your view inside the mind of Sugar Clark.
Be Blessed.
